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MuchMusic (Canada, TV)
October 29, 1992

Tori Amos interview and live performance



Tori said...

I've been trying to go into my subconscious. It's the conversation that I don't have with people that I'm interested in. The things that I'm too scared to say.

Yeah, I had to or I was gonna be like Jell-O on the floor for the rest of my life.

Well, men have periods, too, they just don't bleed. But that doesn't mean that men don't go through what we do. It's just a different way, I think.

In my later teens I had to, I just had to get away from the piano, it was just too -- too much.

I think that we're not encouraged to really go out and explore ourselves.

I had to look at what was really making me so angry. Why was I so angry? I was just so angry, ripped to shreds.

We all have the capacity to be violent, and we can all be cowards. I think that we take on these ideas of what we should be instead of what we are. ... What is it that you could say that could set me off so much. You know, you feel things, and I wanted to know my own mind. I wanted to know, if I wanted to kill you, I wanted to know why.

I think I could justify anything. It was much easier to deny everything, to pretend that I wasn't hurt, that I wasn't angry. And a lot of it is going back to when you were a child ... you don't feel guilty about it. It's okay, you don't have to be friends with everybody.

I really feel like we have to work with the adult and the little kid and the ancient... . and the old crone, with the wisdom. And it's past, present and future all conjunctioning at one time. as well as his wolf, as well as his old man. We're not encouraged to be all these things.

I believe in having lived before.

I used to run away from the idea of having lived before. It was so final, so absolute -- born, die, heaven or hell.

I mean, it's all about soul growth, really. That's what I believe in. It's all of us recognizing, if we were all stripped of everything and put in the desert, what would we have?

["Me and a Gun"]

Each night that I sing it I go into a trance and I feel really freed singing it. It's exhausting singing it, but at the same time, I can sing it, which is something I couldn't. I wrote that in London. That was the last one. That and "China" were the last ones to get on the album. ... and after I saw Thelma

I wrote it in a parking lot in London right before a show.

That song, it's funny how the album was held up 'til that one got on.

I came out with an EP in the UK first, which was "Me and a Gun," with "Silent All These Years" on it, which got all the airplay in the UK.


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