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Magian Line by Brian Hibbs Singer/songwriter Tori Amos is a charm. The voice of an angel coupled with
the soul of a poet, and the heart of a saint. I was first exposed to Tori when
Neil raved about her at length during a phone conversation one evening. When I
finally heard her music, I was floored: how does one woman tear so much passion
and emotion from just a piano and her voice? And there was this peculiar reference to “hanging out with the Dream King”,
and that “Neil says ‘hi’, by the way” in the song “Tear In Your Hand”. Who was
this woman? I had the honor and pleasure of interviewing the lady for the
Magian Line, and if you’re intrigued by her words, I urge you to expose
yourself to her music: The album is Little Earthquakes (with a live concert
video of the same name), and there are 3 EP’s: Winter, and two versions of
Crucify (one live and one studio). All are well worth searching out. Without
further ado, we present Tori Amos... Brian: Let’s start with the obvious question: What’s your
relationship with Neil? Tori Amos: Ummm... Brian: Is that too hard? Do you
want me to rephrase it? Tori Amos: No, no. Ummm... I
think “Dear Friends” is a good way to put it. I really love his work, and we’re
good eating partners. Y’know, we always have terrible meals together. Always.
Horrible. I don’t know what it is, but whenever we meet up to go have a little
snack, it’s always the worst meal of the week. And we’re totally unlucky - even
in good restaurants. We’ll go somewhere that is supposedly half-good, and it
never works. And we both try and eat the other person’s food, thinking that
maybe they did better, but nobody did better. So, we usually hook up in London
a lot, because that’s where we run into each other. Brian: How did you first meet
him? Tori Amos: I have a really good
friend named Rantz, and he is a comic freak. And he, about three years ago,
turned me on to Neil’s work. He turned me on to other things, too, but I was
drawn to Neil’s work. The first thing I ever read was Calliope (Sandman #17).
And then he brought me The Doll’s House. Rantz is like my adopted brother. I’ve
known him for years, and he was an art student at Parson’s, where he
was...dating isn’t the right word...sleeping with a girl that I used to babysit
for. And so, she was at Parson’s too, in her first year. He and I became really
good friends, and he and she became enemies, even though I’ve known her since
she was ten. They just couldn’t get along, but I get along with both of them,
so Rantz and I became like family, but y’know, families don’t get along, so
that’s not a good...we became really dear friends. Brian: What prompted you to work
him into the lyrics of “Tear In Your Hand”? Tori Amos: This was before I met
him, obviously. Recorded before I even knew him. Well, you know, the comics are
like nothing I ever read before. I think he has such an understanding of
the...unconscious. And how...I’m choosing my words carefully, because I don’t
want to just say something...I also think there’s another history that never
gets written about—that we’re never taught, or told. And, I think a lot of
people don’t have any idea why we’re here, what our purpose is, anything like that.
Why is this human experiment even happening, that kind of thing. And I think
Neil has helped us get in touch with our own memories. So that your memory is
different than my memory, but he opens a window for us to go in and find that
ourselves. So when I read this, I felt like it had the real story that we weren’t
being told. Whether the names or the characters change a bit, I feel like it’s
the True story. It’s coded, his work, if you know what I mean—there are lots of
codes in it, and it affects us, I think, even if we don’t think it’s affecting
us, because inside ourselves change when we read it. Brian: I think all good art
affects us that way. Tori Amos: Oh, yeah, I agree with
you. The thing about his work that I felt that some other works didn’t have...I
don’t mean comics, necessarily, I mean, even great books. There’s a lot of
books out that are trying to get us in touch with our subconscious. What he
does that they don’t do, is he has a lack of Judgment—he doesn’t Judge Dark or
Light. I don’t find that in his work, anyway. I think he takes responsibility,
but that’s very different than “bad” and “good”. We’re all made up of everything,
and it becomes a choice at that point. So I felt that he was closer to the
pulse than a lot of writers, because he was willing to not Judge the dark side
of us. Also not to dramatize it either. His work, you see, isn’t just for the
sake of it. You know, like, body-scarring? If it’s just for the sake of
show-and-tell, it’s kind of boring. If there’s something behind it for someone,
that it has some kind of meaning, or that they’ve passed through something
because of it, then it makes a lot of sense for them. Brian: Yeah, living in San
Francisco I see a lot of “weekend warrior” types -- piercing and tattoos and
scarification, it’s a “cool” thing, rather than... Tori Amos: ...Than what it means
to them. I think it comes down to is whether it’s dread’s, whether whatever it
is, is: what does it mean to me. And that’s the only thing you have to answer,
is to yourself. I think that Neil’s characters, particularly his female
characters, I can relate to them, because I think he has a lot of respect for
women. And he doesn’t put them on a pedestal, and he doesn’t abuse them either.
I think he gives it a fair reading. And it deserves that. We deserve that.
Because when you put someone on a pedestal that means you don’t respect them enough
to tell them the truth. Nobody should be on a pedestal. No one. So, I think he
does that. “Tear In Your Hand”...I think that, because all of the things I just
told you, those stories meant a lot to me, and I made a reference to him,
because of that. Brian: What piece of Neil’s work
has had the most resonance for you, specifically? Tori Amos: “Calliope” Being
somebody’s muse. That kind of hit home for me. I understood what it was like
for the guy, not being able to write. And how he would do anything to be able
to write again. And yet, at the same time, what is your work worth when you
have no honor as a person anymore? It has to come back to honor, I think, if
you work as a writer - nothing is worth losing that. It’s very easy to make
excuses, when fame starts coming your way. And I won’t mention names, but I’ve
seen it left and right, how people manipulate their settings...and I’ve done it
myself...how you can manipulate a situation all in the name of shunning publicity,
shunning this, when all it gets them is more publicity. And don’t think for one
minute that most of them don’t know what they’re doing, I think it’s a load of
shit. But I see it a lot of time, and I think the “Calliope” piece...I reread
it a lot, and it makes me remember about where I stand with myself, and why I
do certain things. Brian: Richard Maddoc. Tori Amos: Richard Maddoc. It’s
not like he’s a bad guy. He just bought into something, like I have, like we
all have. And it’s understanding what these choices cost, and then are we
willing to take responsibility when we do something to somebody else? That’s
the big one. And then I’ve got to ask myself, why did I need to do that to this
person? You don’t need to be viscous to somebody when you’re dealing with your
own stuff. Neil gives me feedback quite a bit. I don’t know if I give him much
feedback, but I feel like it comes from a very kind place, and supportive
place. For those writers out there reading this, if someone makes you feel rotten
about their stuff, then you should throw out everything that person says. If
someone can’t be honest with you and say, “Well, this didn’t speak to me, but I
appreciate the fact that you needed to write this.”, if you can’t get some kind
of balance, then I think you should throw both of them out. The adoring press,
and the vicious press all end up in the trash can. The bottom line, is if
someone needs to be vicious to you, Brian, something is really wrong. This is
not about, they didn’t like my record, and I know that. If they can be clear
about their observations, and really go after certain points, then I can grow
from it, and learn from it. When it comes down to a vicious thing, it’s like, “Since
when did I spend a week in the bathtub with this person and we know each other
to be this viscous?” Brian: I’ve always thought it was
central in criticism to separate your personal feelings from the work. Tori Amos: But that’s hard to do
for most people. So for those writers out there they need to remember that if
critics can’t do it, most people can’t separate their own thing, whether they
got fired that day, or nobody’s given them any encouragement, it might be hard
for them to give you any. I think...well, I’ll tell you, I’ve just had a falling
out with a girlfriend of mine—you’re going to hear a lot about this on the next
record, she was very close to me—I loved her with all my heart. Anyway, if you
had asked me if we could’ve worked it out, I would’ve bet one of my hands on
it. Well, I’d be missing a hand right now. I won’t go into the details of what
it was, and of course, there’s both sides to it and everything, but she was
never able to be supportive, ever. I’m usually able to be supportive, because I
feel pretty good about myself, most of the time. It just got to the point of,
when somebody makes you feel bad about yourself all the time, why am I there? |