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“pop quiz” The College Daze of Tori Amos This is the longer, unedited version of the interview which appeared at the
Student Advantage web site. There were also more questions there than what
appeared in the publication. From lounge lizard to star songstress, this spiritual diva left her small
town college behind-and took to the stages of the world, Ah, the irony: for a performer with so many college-age fans, Tori Amos
rarely talks about her own college days. In fact, all over the Internet, the
Tori Amos Web sites tell essentially the same story: “After high school, Tori
landed a gig as a piano player/singer at the Hilton Hotel in Myrtle Beach,
South Carolina, while taking music-related courses at Montgomery College.” But
while that’s all they write, an essential key to understanding Amos’s career
may lie just in two of those words: “music-related.” Armed with a set of piano and vocal skills that landed her at the
ultra-prestigious Peabody Institute as a five-year-old, Amos clearly knew what
she wanted from college and set out to get it...and only it. While she now says
she was ultimately disappointed by her college years, she rebounded well
nonetheless-eventually parlaying those Hilton Hotel gigs into a series of
recordings that led to 1991’s Little Earthquakes. That breakthrough album
marked the arrival of one of the decade’s most controversial, unorthodox and
uncompromising piano-straddling artists, and Amos is still going strong three
albums later. In fact, her latest work, From the Choirgirl Hotel, is being
called one of her most stunning efforts yet, and the tour to support it, her
first with a full band, in also turning heads. In honor of her continued
success, we invited Amos to take SAM’s Pop Quiz---where she explains how a
little college and a lot of commitment could turn you, too, into a bonafide pop
music icon. My decision to pursue only
music-related coursework at Montgomery College was: a) surprisingly popular with my parents, b) in retrospect, a mistake, c) one of my better early decisions, d) a way to buy time for me to hang in clubs. Answer: (a) and (c) My father
wanted me to have a doctorate in music. And I told him that Warner Bros. doesn’t
give a shit whether you have a degree or not. I think what you have to be aware
of with the field you’re going after is “What are the qualifications you need
to do this thing?” For me, what was important wasn’t pop stardom, but being a
good songwriter. A degree doesn’t give just give you that title, as you know.
So I decided to start reading everything I could get my hands on and started to
become self-taught at a certain age. But you have to remember I was at Peabody
Conservatory at age 5. I had a lot of musical training. But I just started to
feel like the institution [Montgomery College] did not have the right courses
to take me to the next step. They could make me a music teacher, a church
organist or a mediocre concert pianist-because there are very few ‘great’ ones.
But they couldn’t make me a great songwriter. I had to create those courses
myself separate from that. And that was definitely the best thing I did. Except
I should have never gone in the first place. I wish I would have a found a
mentor or a tutor-somebody that was a really good songwriter-instead and taken
private courses with them. I just didn’t have any luck finding a songwriter
like that. I haven’t seen anybody teach it right yet anyway. And there are
indeed things that can be taught, like what ingredients it takes and how to get
them. There are things you can look to draw from. For instance, I have art
books and symbology books all over my house. I have loads of mythology
everywhere, so I can pull word-association that strikes people in a certain
way-a really deep way, on a level they’re not really aware of because these
symbols have been passed down for thousands of years and have this really deep
power. That’s what you can teach. Not how to put it together, but how to be
inspired. Knowing that there are hundreds of
Tori Amos Web sites collecting my quotes, including The Church Of Tori and The
Tori Amos Quote Of The Day Page, I find myself: a) more cautious about what I say, b) no more or less cautious, c) embarrassed by what I’ve said in the past, d) just trying not repeat myself. Answer: (e) All of the above. It’s
a constant pendulum swing from “Why did I say that,” to “I’m glad I said that.
It needed to be said,” to “Thank God I don’t have a computer.” But as a
songwriter, if you’re getting people to have a discussions-and can become a springboard,
which is what you really hope you are-you always hope your audience surpasses
you in the end. I’m talking about the ones that want to be writers. As my
shrink has said to me, “There’s got to be a time where you look at me and you
don’t need me anymore. I can become your friend and you come and have tea with
me, but you won’t need me.” And that’s a joy when somebody learns from a
person, takes it and applies it in their own art. I know that some people haven’t
really found their niche yet. But I have to be honest with you. I think part of
the pain in this world is that people haven’t found their creative niche to
work out their feeling and anger. They don’t know where to put it or they cut
it off and pretend it doesn’t exist. And as writers we always hope we get
people discussing issues and it become like dominoes. I say something, then
they say something, and then I read something somebody writes and think “Hey,
wait a minute. I didn’t think of it that way.” And so on and so on and so on,
like an Agree commercial. The overwhelming commitment of my
fans is: a) frightening, b) touching, c) motivational, d) something I try not to consider too much. Answer: (d) I’m really interested
in always pushing the line as a writer and yet, still talking in English-although
it may not look like it. But it goes to “What’s cryptic?” If we really start
studying writers you and I probably love, it’s not Moon and June. It is
word-association and you do have to know your myths to get it. Just because
people don’t know their myths and hardly read anymore, does it mean I’m cryptic
or does it mean we’re just very uneducated as far as our word paints. Our
pallet is like four colors now. We’re back to red, blue and what’s the other
one? See what I’m saying. I do feel sometimes that if it’s not
three-dimensional and so tangible that it can work back-to-back with Rikki Lake
and Jerry Springer then people think the writers aren’t making sense. To me,
the audience isn’t making sense. I feel half the audience is working on a McDonald’s
mentality-and I have no problem with the french fries. They’re all over my
thighs. Left, right and center, they’re there-you’ll find them if we ever wind
up in a coffin together. But I do feel like I’m encouraging college students to
stretch. You all have a responsibility to understand your writers rather then
rolling your eyes and concluding they’re not making sense. Or maybe you’re just
a dingbat. I feel like it’s a challenge. I feel like I’ve made an agreement with the
people who come hear the music. If I keep pushing things and stay on vision
quest as far as being a writer, I think they’ll give it a go. If I don’t and
they smell a sellout it’s over. That’s the deal. I don’t care how committed
some of them seem-I’m telling you if I auditioned to be Gerri Spice, it would
have been all over... although it was tempting. It’s motivational, but
sometimes I’m going “Go apply this to your own masterpiece, which should be
your life.” And I think some of them do. I started so young but was 28 before
I found real fame. It: a) made me thankful for my failures, b) came just in time, c) still came too soon for me to handle appropriately, d) all of the above. Answer: (d) I meet people know
who make it young, very young-20, 18, whatever. Let’s not get into naming names
here. But you hear stories about how there’s a sense of entitlement and also
fear. They push good people away. They urinate on them because they’ve never
had to work a day in their life. There’s no understanding of “this is a good
person,” or “this is a person who’s trying to use me.” You have to be a team
player, even if you’re a solo artist. You must pull people in or you will fail.
In the end, even look at Prince. I’m sorry. But when it becomes so about you,
you loose objectivity. As great as the “symbol” was, there’s a level where we
can all learn from the fact that if you put yourself on a pedestal so high you
can’t even find your way off it, it’s dangerous. A really important thing I
always want to say to young people is that there’s a huge value in-I don’t want
to call it failure-but in things not working out well. How’s that? In nothing
the part or job...in not getting recognized. It makes you have to recognize
yourself and recognize your weaknesses. A lot of these kids making it at 19 don’t
have any weaknesses as far as they’re concerned. So it gets scary when all of
them think that without having a skill they can all be Slylvia Plath and John
Lennon. It’s like “hang on a minute.” Just because you’re famous and you sell
millions of records doesn’t mean you have the skill to do everything on the
planet-shock and amazement. But I’m telling you, it would be shocking how many
people have no healthy view of themselves and their egos. Their egos are so out
of control that again, it goes back to entitlement-their fame, not their
ability, gets them in the door. It’s real important and thrilling that I had so
many rejections. I can usually see when I’ve got it right and when I don’t. And
when I’m confused I have a team of people around me who sit me down and say, “This
isn’t going to go on the record Tori. We’re going to erase this because we love
you.” The songs I didn’t write but most
admire are: a) cryptic, b) autobiographical, c) narrative, d) pure meaningless pop. Answer: You have to remember that
for me cryptic probably means something other than what it would for someone
else. I’ve been called the “Queen Of Cryptic” and I don’t think I write like
that all. It makes total sense to me. Then again, I think I also know what
other so-called cryptic songwriters are about because it’s what I put most of
my time in-reading poets like Sylvia Plath or Anne Sexton. I was in my late
teens and early twenties really trying to open myself up to their work and
instead of tearing it to shreds I really tried to crawl inside and listen. It’s
hard to start tearing writers down that are surviving a few books and are
obviously good at what they do. Instead of wasting your time trying to
discredit them, why not grow and see why they’re touching people? But the fascinating thing about being a musician right now, and this should
give all the college kids hope, is that this is a time where if you can’t play
an instrument, sing or write anything, you can still be the biggest pop star in
the world. That’s quite fantastic isn’t it? Everyone should leave their
studies, go get a record deal and just put on some tight dresses and shake. It
could be quite huge. But the big inspiration for me has been always been about autobiographical
songs with a mix of narrative. For me, the two weave together. When it’s great,
it goes between Who are they in the song? and Are they the one singing ‘I’ or
are they just taking that on as the singer? Touring is hardest on: a) my fingers, b) my voice, c) my freedom, d) my friends. Answer: My hands are pretty good.
Sometimes I have carpal-tunnel problems, but we’re angling the piano in
different ways. One of the engineers is a physicist so we deal with different
angles of the piano to give my hands a break. And now that I’m playing half the
night on my right side things are better. I used to play only piano, but now I
play part of the show on the synth, so I’m giving my shoulder a rest. But it’s
really the hardest on my jaw. You don’t know this, but I have chronic, chronic
TMJ. I’ve had it since I was 15. Part of my jaw doesn’t go into the bone-which
is a hook and pulling my skull to the right. And what happens is my right side
goes into spasm and my neck and shoulder get almost paralytic. And so, I have
braces at night I have to wear and I can hardly talk. I can’t do interviews in
the braces although they would help me. That’s really where my handicap is-or
because you can’t say handicap anymore, its my physical challenge. But, at the same time, I love it so much. What it gives to you on an
endorphin level the gym could never give me. It’s emotional. So you make up for
it was an incredible structure on the road. We have a chef on the road that
makes really healthy food and I have a wine cellar on the road. It has to be good
wine or you get sick and can’t play anymore. It hurts the voice. Everything is
discipline-major Chinese medicine on the road. Everyone-go to the Tea Garden in
LA-they’ll make an elixir for you. They do it for the Stones. Look at Keith
Richards. How does he keep going? I’m telling you it’s the Chinese medicine,
along with the blood transfusions. Chinese medicine has changed my touring. And
sometimes you have to roll on the low-dose steroids when you can’t breathe in
towns. You have to make sure that on every level it’s all in balance. The body
is like a formula-one racing car. You’re not the driver, you’re the car... and
you have to keep going. If I’d of never been exposed to ____
my musical life would be different: a) Little Richard, b) Janis Joplin, c) the Beatles, d) Joni Mitchell. Answer: (e) It has to be all of
the above. Neither one can take the place of the other. Impossible. Some
people, though, are poor imitations. They’re not the creators, they’re the
parasites. As you and I both know, there are people who look at the artist and
it is in a form that’s very diluted-a Moon and June form almost. You’re not
having good wine-you really aren’t. You can’t compare Guinness in a can with
going there and having it on tap. It’s a different experience, it a difference
of craft. So if you really want to taste good wine-the difference between a
1990 O???? and a table cabernet at $14 is a different experience and I don’t
care if I’m hurting cabernet’s concept of themselves. So California wines are
wonderful, however a lot of them aren’t. I think it depends on what you expose
yourself to. What I used to think is great in wine isn’t anymore because I’ve
been exposed more to the little places in France and Italy where you realize “My
god, they only put out so many. So very few.” You don’t even know they exist,
because they don’t even show up in Wine Spectator. It’s the same way with
musicians you may have once found influential. So while somebody like Kate Bush
is unique and a force, a lot of times are put into a form so diluted that they
haven’t developed their own thing. So it’s one thing to be inspired but you
have to develop yourself. And so many artists don’t and are just a hodgepodge
of many. And that’s why in 50 years you won’t be hearing about any of them.
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